How to get your kids to eat vegetables…

Unfortunately most children recoil when faced with a pile of vegetables and this can put tremendous pressure on parents during meal times. It is vital for children to eat a variety of vegetables in order for them to receive essential vitamins – so how can you get your kids to eat veg?

Hide them…
Hiding vegetables should really be the last resort as it more important for kids to get used to eating vegetables as part of their daily meal. However, if your child will not touch a vegetable then try blending boiled cauliflower and broccoli and adding it to a tomato-based pasta sauce. You can also try adding raw grated carrot, which will give the sauce a nice sweet flavour. Blended soups are also a fantastic way of packing in handfuls of tasty vegetables and your child should be none the wiser. You could try adding pureed cauliflower or broccoli to creamy mashed potato too.

Making faces…
Make meal times fun. Food should be attractive – after all, who wants to eat a pile of overcooked boiled sprouts? Make salad faces with grated carrot or cress for the hair, halved grapes for the eyes and a red pepper smile – be inventive and see what you can create!

Getting involved…
Even better, get kids involved with food preparation – let them create their own smiley-face plates. Let them experiment with vegetables – there’s lots of things children can do without it being dangerous – mashing (potatoes and cauliflower), squashing with a fork (cooked sweet potatoes and new potatoes) and handling food to make something attractive that they would like to eat. Also remember kids like things that taste sweet – try roasting carrots and parsnips instead of boiling, you could even add a teaspoon of honey to the roasting process.

Setting an example…
Make sure that you eat the same vegetables that you’re serving to your kids – they’re unlikely to eat anything that you won’t touch! If children see you eat a healthy-sized salad, then they’re likely to follow suit. Bitter salad leaves can be made sweeter with dressings such as balsamic glaze – which actually looks like chocolate sauce too and is available from most good supermarkets.

Aperitif…
When you’re preparing a meal and your kids are hungry, leave a bowl full of raw carrot sticks, mangetout and baby tomatoes and baby corn on the table – provide a nice cream cheese dip or houmous and just watch as they start to pick!

We want to hear from you! How do you get your kids to eat vegetables?

Must have Christmas party dresses for 2009…

It’s nearly that time of year, when it’s time to let your hair down and have fun at the annual work Christmas party. The high street is abundant with fabulous dresses and you’re bound to find one that flatters regardless of age, shape and size!

Here are our favourites for Christmas 2009:

One Shoulder Slinky Dress…

Simple and elegant, yet stylish and edgy – this dress has it all. Wear with black opaque tights and heels for a classic look or wear with patterned or colourful tights to add a splash of colour. The great thing about this classic black dress is that it’s versatile and makes a great wardrobe staple.

Find it here:

Rise Berry Sparkle Dress…

Those who wish to make a colourful statement should invest in this ultra-glam sparkly dress. Figure hugging and shiny – this dress is for the brave only! The price tag is attractive too.

Find it here:

Animal print maxi dress…

This uber-stylish maxi dress would look great teamed with a pair of killer heels and a couple of chunky bangles. The print is bang on trend and the length is great for those who do not wish to flash too much flesh at the Christmas party!

Find it here:

Pleated Sleeve Jaquard Dress…

Lady Gaga would certainly go gaga over this statement dress! With bold sleeve details and rich fabric, you’re guaranteed to turn a few heads wearing this beauty.

Find it here:

Being single and happy…is it possible?

Those who are expecting an article giving advice on how to meet other single people will sadly be disappointed, this piece will offer no such advice. We need to stop thinking that the word ’single’ is something to be feared or avoided, indeed we need to stop thinking that ’single’ is a dirty word. It can be one of the most wonderful things in the world, but unfortunately lots of people still have a problem with it. Why? Let me explain…

Firstly we need to look at how society looks at single people and let’s start with films and fairytales – nearly every movie has a romantic storyline that goes a little something like this: boy meets girl – struggles to win girl over – eventually gets together with girl and boy and girl live happy ever after. Even if it’s not as obvious as that, more often than not there is an unrealistic undercurrent of sexual tension or romance. Fairytales tell us that beautiful girls meet charming princes and again live happily ever after and single women are often portrayed as unattractive witches or old ladies who live alone in tiny houses. What type of message does this send out to young girls or indeed grown women? It’s ludicrous. Times have moved on since a woman’s place was in the kitchen (thank god) so why do some people still look at single people, in particular single women, with pity?

Before moving on it’s important to note that this article isn’t an anti-relationship piece. Good, strong relationships are hard to find but when you do they can be wonderful, fulfilling and filled with love. However, many people are stuck in unhappy relationships for fear of being single – which is a shame as it really isn’t as frightening as they think. There are many things people can experience and enjoy whilst being single which they can’t when attached.

Being single is often a choice people make, it’s not because there’s something wrong with the individual or even because they can’t meet a partner, it’s because they choose to remain as they are, happy and free.

Tracy Lamar summed it up perfectly when she looked at the word ’single’ and really tried to understand the true meaning behind the definition, she reminded us that ”single simply means one” she then goes on to say that “one is considered a whole number. The number one does not need any other numbers to accompany it. It is complete and whole all by itself.” this is something we need to think about, because it is essentially true. When you’re single, you have more time to concentrate on yourself. This means that you can really get to know yourself inside out, you can listen to your heart and recognise what it wants. If you’re single then enjoy your freedom and time. You can afford time to learn what your expectations are and more importantly learn to feel totally comfortable and relaxed in your own skin. Many people in relationships take what they’re lacking from the other person – this can lead to resentment and an imbalance within the partnership.

It is possible to be happy as a single woman? Of course it is. When you’re single you don’t have to answer to anyone, you’re free to do what you want, when you want. You’re free to explore yourself and being independent and totally in charge of your life will only make you a stronger person.

Attitudes need to change towards single women. If you’re a single woman who casually dates then good on you, that’s your choice – men do this and get a pat on the back, why shouldn’t women? If you decide that you prefer being alone and enjoy your own company as well as the company of good friends then this is equally ok, again this is your choice. Remember, often the people who are in relationships giving you the pitying looks or trying to set you up with friends aren’t in happy relationships themselves. These people are scared of being alone and therefore falsely think that they sense your fear. They only need to take a few moments to realise that being single doesn’t mean ‘alone’ at all, it means that the world is your oyster and you’re free to do whatever you wish to do, whenever you wish to do it…

Are you stressed?

The question of whether you’re feeling stressed or not isn’t as black and white as most people would like to think. You can be stressed and not even realise it, which is often a concept people find hard to understand. Listening to your body is the key to tuning in to your stress levels and you might be surprised at the results.

Being aware…

Most of us have a certain level of stress in our daily lives and this is completely normal. A bad day at the office or an argument with a loved one can make our stress levels rise through the roof but so long as we’re aware of these feelings then we’re on the right path to understanding ourselves and dealing with our feelings of stress.

Triggers…

Do you know what triggers your stress? Maybe it’s important meetings at work or social gatherings? Everyone has different triggers and again, it’s good to be aware of what makes you feel uncomfortable in order to learn individual coping methods. Never avoid what makes you feel stressed. In the long run this will be counter-productive and could even cause phobias. Learn ways of coping – for some yoga and meditation is a great help as it slows down our breathing and quietens the inner critical voice. Others just find that sharing their worries with a friend makes them feel better but for some stress can become problematic and demands further attention. If your stress levels are constant or you feel as though you can’t control how you react to stress then chat to your GP who can asses the situation and may refer you to a counsellor. Take a look below to see the classic mental symptoms of stress.

Mental symptoms of stress:

• Anxiety
• Panic attacks
• Depression
• Increased or decreased appetite
• Feeling tired
• Difficulty concentrating

Being unaware…

There is a good reason for listening to your body – ignoring or being unaware of stress can be detrimental to your health in the long run. So, how do we ‘listen’ to our bodies and how do we know if we are suffering from stress? Take a look at these classic stress symptoms:

Physical symptoms of stress:

• Change in sleep patterns
• Dizzy spells or fainting
• Pins and needles
• Pounding heart
• Loss of sexual desire
• Chest pains
• Constipation or diarrhoea
• Feeling sick
• Skin problems

If you are feeling any of these symptoms yet lead a relatively healthy life with a reasonable amount of exercise and a good diet then you may be suffering from stress.
Stress manifests itself in a number of physical ways and even having a seemingly innocuous condition such as dry skin or a sore stomach – your body could be trying to tell you that it’s time to address your stress. If you ignore stress it won’t go away – it’ll find a way out and can even lead to heart conditions and stomach ulcers. Listen to your body and take a look at your life – are you happy? Are you going through a big change? Try to pinpoint what it is that is making you feel stressed and seek advice immediately.

Remember, stress is normal and not something that you should hide. Be honest and open with your friends and you’ll be surprised by how many people suffer and you might pick up some valuable tips on how to cope with stressful situations.

Useful websites:

www.nhs.uk

www.bupa.com

Dealing with an unwanted or unplanned pregnancy…

Unwanted or unplanned pregnancies do happen. The biggest aspect of dealing with a pregnancy that was not consciously planned is figuring out if you are going to keep the baby, place the baby up for adoption, or abort the unborn child – each of these choices have positive and negative consequences. The consequences can be felt by the mother only, if she chooses to exclude her partner in the decision making process.

If you are a young adult, then the very first thing you should do is to inform your parents, social worker at school, or some other adult that you trust know. Pregnancy is emotionally draining on adult women and as a young adult or child you are facing decisions that you are going to need support with. Once you have told an adult, you next need to inform your partner. If you are an adult, this is the first thing you should do. Then, once everyone is informed of this pregnancy it is time to weigh your options. Depending on how far along in your pregnancy you are, you may have the option of aborting the unborn child. This is not a decision that should be made easily or lightly as you may regret the decision later in your life. Speak to a doctor or nurse beforehand, to see what your options are.

One other option available to you if you do not plan on keeping this child is adoption. Adoption is an option, regardless of age. You can arrange to know the adoptive parents or you can do an adoption without knowing them. Adoption usually brings a couple that can not have children a child of their own. This option is best if you are not emotionally, or financially able to care for a child.

With adoption, please bear in mind that once the child turns 18, they are legally allowed to find you – even without your consent.
Many adopted children are happy with the families they have been adopted into and never search for their birth family, but there are also those that are happy and do search. Likewise, you also have the ability to search and find a child you gave up for adoption at the time they turn 18.

If this does happen and you are reunited with your child you gave up, there are no guarantees that they will understand your decision to give them up. There are also no guarantees that they will be satisfied with the life they have had with their adoptive family.
No matter what you decide, do so with a clear mind and please make sure that you don’t make the decision alone.

Helpful contacts:

www.womenshealthlondon.org.uk

www.mariestopes.org.uk

www.adoptionuk.org

www.direct.gov.uk

How to spot a commitment-phobe…

Someone who has commitment-phobia (also referred to as ‘emotionally unavailable’) has a strong fear of commitment – usually in the context of relationships. Both men and women can be affected by commitment-phobia, but it seems to be more commonplace amongst men.

There are many reasons why a man could be afraid of commitment and being in a relationship with someone who shows the typical signs can be a painful and frustrating experience. So, how can we spot them and how do we know that they are a commitment-phobe and not just in the wrong relationship?

Aside from asking him if he’s happy in the relationship, there’s certain behavioural patterns that make commitment-phobes stand out.

Relationship history

Of course this is age dependant and wouldn’t necessarily relate to a man in his early 20s, but if you’re dating someone who has a history of very short relationships it’s usually a strong indication that he has issues committing himself to one person. If the person in question has a long list of month-long ‘relationships’ then it might be difficult to get them to commit to you on a long term basis.

Being verbally clear

Many commitment-phobes often make their desires quite clear from the moment they start dating. They may declare that they have no desire to settle down, or there’s plenty of time left for marriage, or even say that they don’t want an exclusive relationship with one woman. Often when someone says “I am too busy right now for a relationship” this means that they’re not ready to settle down, or are actually afraid to ‘give up their freedom’, which unfortunately can be the way that they look at relationships.

Needing space

It can be confusing if you’re involved with someone who has shown a strong level of interest for a while then suddenly turns to you after a month or so and demands the need for ‘space’. The need for ‘space’ whilst maintaining some sort of relationship with you, can mean that he still wants to keep hold of you, yet feels claustrophobic and does not wish to feel ‘tied down’. This feeling of being tied down is part of the phobia and is brought on by his own fears – unless of course you’re putting an unreasonable amount of pressure on him to commit!

Closing up

If he closes up or gets nervous when you mention your future together (after a reasonable amount of time dating) then he’s definitely showing signs that he’s scared. This can be very confusing if he was initially the one to woo you into a relationship. Remember talk means nothing; it’s his actions that count. So be aware that at the start of any kind of relationship, if he’s making promise after promise, without actually acting out his promises, his words are empty.

Keeping you separate from his friends

If, after a few months you still haven’t met any of his friends then you know that something is seriously wrong. This is acceptable for a casual relationship, but if he has given you the impression that you’re both exclusive and yet doesn’t want you to meet his closest friends then what does this say? It says that he doesn’t see you as part of his future.

Still unsure?

If you’re still unsure whether you’re dating a commitment-phobe then the sensible thing to do would be to ask him what he wants, with regards to your relationship – simple? Well not really…you’ll have to ensure that you ask in such a way that you’re not putting pressure on him, after all, if he is afraid of commitment then this alone could make him run away! Be gentle, give him a little space and see what his reaction is. If he closes up and distances himself from you, then you’re more than likely on a losing streak and no matter how patient you are it might not make a difference. Either accept that your relationship is casual or move on. However if he admits to being afraid – well done! You can then make steps towards getting him help. Talking about this with a professional could really make a difference.

Must-have footwear to look out for in 2009…

Put your best foot forward this year and embrace this season’s footwear trends. Whether it’s a practical pair of winter boots or a killer pair of heels that takes your fancy, you’re guaranteed to find that perfect pair…

Trends to look out for:

Thigh-high boots

It’s all about the over-the-knee boot this season. These boots are super sexy and carry bags of attitude, but need to be worn with caution. Avoid the ‘Julia Roberts’ look in Pretty Woman and instead of teaming with a body con dress, wear over leggings, skinny jeans or opaque tights and a long jumper dress. Heeled and flat versions are abundant on the high street, but again, if you’re not blessed with Gisele style stature (and let’s face it, not many of us are) then opt for a pair with a slight heel to elongate your legs.

Thigh-high Boots

Pencil heels

The sexiest heel by far is the pencil heel, which promises to draw admiring glances from both sexes. These gravity-defying heels will elongate your legs, lift your bottom and give you a sexy walk. They will also no doubt give you painful feet so invest in a pair of Scholl Party Feet to ease the inevitable pressure on the balls of your feet and toes. Look out for pencil heels with a raised platform at the front or gladiator-style strappy versions to be ahead of the fashion game.

Pencil Heels

Booties

Not quite boots and not quite heels, booties are a girl’s best friend this season as they’re sturdy, fashionable and above all…sexy. There’s more good news too, booties are available in every imaginable colour and style. If you want to add a bit of oomph to an outfit, why not wear a pair of classic black patent booties?

Lace Booties - Topshop

Animal prints

We’ve talked about animal prints for quite some time on this blog, as it was and still is the print of choice for handbags and clothing. Now we’re seeing animal prints on shoes and boots too – perfect for adding an ‘accent’ of trend to an existing outfit.

Animal Print Gladiator Shoes

Drink your way to great health…

Feeling sluggish and need an energy boost? Need an instant vitamin boost? Or perhaps you’re just tired of drinking supermarket smoothies and juices which have been pasteurised, which lose their original goodness? Freshly prepared juices and smoothies are usually fairly expensive if you don’t make them yourself, so it’s worth investing in a good juicer and blender – both of which are available to buy for as little as £15 each. This is by far the cheaper option and it means that you can experiment with different fresh ingredients, creating delicious juices that your mind, body and soul will love.

Fresh Juice

Take a look at our guide below for fresh juice and smoothie ideas:

Energy boost…

If your body and mind is feeling weary and you feel like you need a bit of an energy boost, stay well clear of drinks that claim to give you an ‘instant’ boost as this usually means that they contain caffeine and sugar, which will certainly ‘pick you up’…and then shortly ‘drop’ you when your sugar levels plummet.

One to try:

Zingy Beetroot Juice

2 x medium beetroots – washed and scrubbed

3 x green apples – washed

2 inches root ginger- washed and peeled

2 x carrots – washed and scrubbed

1 x lemon – peeled

Chop the ingredients into medium-sized chunks and put through a juicer. Drink immediately.

Wholesome breakfast…

Hungry and don’t have time to prepare a healthy breakfast? Try making yourself a tasty smoothie using fresh or frozen fruit. Quick to consume, smoothies provide your body with slow-releasing energy and can fill you up until lunchtime.

One to try:

Fruity Breakfast Smoothie

1 x banana

Large handful frozen or fresh mixed berries (strawberries, raspberries, blueberries)

Fresh apple juice

Honey

Add fruit to the blender and whizz. Slowly begin to pour in the fresh apple juice until you reach the desired consistency. Pour into a tall glass and top with a drizzle of honey.

Vitamin boost…

Let’s face it, it’s difficult to eat five portions of fruit and vegetables a day and because of this most of us lack the essential vitamins that we need for our bodies to run like a smooth engine and brains to function clearly. A simple way of getting essential vitamins into your system fast, is to make your own fresh juice. Be experimental with fruit and vegetables – try different flavours and combinations.

One to try:

Vitamin-Packed Juice

5 x carrots – washed and scrubbed

1 x apple – washed

2 x beetroots – washed and scrubbed

Chop the fruit into medium-sized chunks and push the fruit through a juicer. Pour into a glass and enjoy!

Do we still believe in the seven year itch and can we avoid it?

Most of us will be familiar with the term ’seven year itch’, which often refers to the length of time where many marriages encounter serious problems which result in divorce. Over the years there has been an impressive amount of research in this particular field and there are many libraries brimming with worldwide statistics, which build back-bone to this ’seven year’ argument.

But aren’t we just generalising? Divorce rates roller coaster each year, due to a variety of personal factors – so therefore should we still be concerned about the shelf-life of our marriages? According to David Batty (The Guardian) divorce rates hit an all time low in the Britain last year, so that must mean that we’re ok, right?

We shouldn’t be so complacent. Whether the seven year itch really exists or not, it’s important to remember that the recipe for a healthy and long-lasting relationship requires a healthy sprinkling of compromise, a good slug of communication and a generous handful of effort to make it work. All relationships encounter certain obstacles and it’s how we can avoid certain problems and how we deal with them that will ultimately effect the longevity of a partnership.

Stop causing problems…

There are some problems that are unavoidable and some which are created by ourselves and are entirely unnecessary. The moment you start to feel yourself taking your partner for granted, you must take a step back to remember why you fell in love with them in the first place, then take time to make them feel appreciated. Infidelity is the largest cause of divorce and this can be avoided by again, removing yourself from the situation before it is allowed to grow, and asking yourself what it is that you believe this ‘other’ will be able to give you? If you find yourself contemplating an infidelity, then you need to look at why this is? Once you have figured this out, then you can work this out with your partner and save your marriage before it’s too late.

Image by Anne Taylor

Dealing with the unavoidable…

As mentioned earlier, communication plays a vital role in a healthy relationship. You should be able to talk openly with one another, to be able to share your thoughts and fears, dreams and aspirations. Storing up seemingly ‘tedious’ issues, let alone any major issues, will only cause pain and resentment at a later date. Be sure to share your concerns as and when they enter your mind and learn the art of compromise.

Having a positive outlook…

Ultimately we need to forget the seven year itch notion and look at relationships with a positive outlook. Thinking that a marriage will pass its ’sell by date’ will only cause problems the closer you get to the seven year milestone…e.g. ”we’ve been happy for six and a half years honey, let’s make the most of our final six months”. Be positive and open, communicate, have fun and don’t fear the future – life throws all sorts of problems our way and we find ways to cope, remember that you’re made of strong stuff and together you can be invincible.

Warm up this winter and invest in a faux fur coat…

Well readers, it’s that transitional time of year when the weather begins to take a turn for the worst and the nights become crisp and cold. We can no longer get away with wearing our lightweight cardigans casually draped over our cotton tops, it’s now time for warmth and comfort and above all it’s time to think about investing in a new autumn/winter coat.

There’s nothing better than wrapping up warm and feeling cosy when the weather outside is freezing, so that’s why we’re happy that one of the biggest fashion trends this season is the ubiquitous fake fur coat. Found in designer shops and on the high-street, fake fur jackets and coats range in style and price and you can be sure that there will be one out there that suits your body shape and makes you look truly fabulous.

Take a look below at our favourite fake fur jackets/coats of this season:

Boxy Faux Fur Chubby Coat
Despite the name, this wonderful fake fur coat from Topshop is an ultra-glamorous choice. Easy to wear and surprisingly flattering, this boxy vintage-style coat is available in several colours and would look fantastic over skinny jeans or leggings.

Boxy Faux Fur Chubby Coat

Visit Topshop for more details…

Faux Fur Coat
This versatile faux fur coat from River Island has been designed with a classic shape that will suit most shapes and sizes. This is the type of coat that would look great both dressed-up with a pair of sexy heels and dressed-down with some well-fitting jeans. We especially love the vintage-style collar.

Visit River Island for more details…

Grey Cropped Feather Jacket
Ok, so it’s technically not a fake fur jacket but this cheeky little number from Miss Selfridge is still warm and cosy and would look fantastic worn over a party dress. Grey is a versatile colour and it’s chic too – you’d get a surprising amount of wear out of this fashionable and feathery item.

Visit Miss Selfridge for more details…

Diesel Faux Fur Jacket
This gorgeous brown faux fur jacket provides a modern twist with contrasting cuffs. Again, this is yet another example of a jacket that can be worn with different types of clothing, be it casual or dressy. It’s even machine-washable too, so you can forget about expensive dry-cleaning costs.

Diesel Faux Fur Jacket

Visit ASOS for more details…